After 20 plus years of marriage, there has been a lot of knowledge learned!

 

 

My husband and I celebrated our 20th wedding anniversary a few years ago!!

It has not been an easy road, but it’s been an adventure filled with many ups & downs, failures, success, accomplishments and never-ending love! I can say that I have been with my husband more than I have been without him. I’ve been with him more than half of my life…let that sink in! I got married when I was twenty years old. Many people think that was a little young, but when you know you’ve found the right person, why wait?

 

 

 

 

The definition of marriage? How do you define marriage?

Marriage can be defined in many different ways, depending on who you ask. I have my own definition of marriage, as I’m sure my husband has his own definition.

I define marriage as:

-the state of being united as spouses

-an intimate or close union between two people

 

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Here’s our story…

We met back when my husband and my mom worked at the same retail store. She worked in the store, and he worked in the restaurant in the store. My mom would go to the store restaurant to have lunch often, and they would talk to one another. We started dating shortly after I graduated from high school; so as close to high school sweethearts without being actual high school sweethearts. We dated for 3 years before we actually said our “I Do’s”. So in actuality, we have officially been a couple for twenty-three years, and married for twenty years! I was twenty years old, he was twenty-three years old and we were new parents when we got married. We didn’t have a lot of money, but we knew we loved each other and our new little family, and that’s all that mattered!

 

From then to now…

 

We’ve come a long way from when we first got married. We have two amazing daughters, and are enjoying our time as almost empty nesters! Our empty nester phase will be different but interesting, as we adapt to our lives without both of our daughters living at home. I look forward to that next chapter in our lives and spending time as an actual “couple”. There have been so many things that I have learned and found out about myself and my husband over the past twenty plus years. When people ask us how long we’ve been married and we tell them, their number one question they always ask us is; “What is the secret to staying married that long”? First, we normally look at each other and laugh; then we answer almost at the same time, COMPROMISE!!! Marriage is a roller coaster and things can almost change daily. The main thing to remember is to compromise and be willing to be flexible in your married life.

So, I decided what better way to celebrate my 20th wedding anniversary than to share 20 important facts that I’ve learned, realized, and have done over 20 years of marriage! Also, I will share with you our awesome wedding anniversary gift that we had made! It’s so special, and I absolutely LOVE it! Enjoy!

 

20 important facts that have worked from 20 years of marriage

(In no particular order…)

1. Compliment each other.

Everyone loves to hear how amazing, beautiful or handsome they look!

2. Date each other.

Try to aim for a minimum of 2 date nights a month.

3. Laugh together.

A good laugh cures most problems!

4. Share your dreams & goals with one another.

Dream together and set goals as a couple too.

5. Listen to each other.

So important. Each person must feel that they are being listened to.

6. Love each other for who you are.

You can’t change each other, so love each other the way you are!

7. Little things do count.

A call. A text. Helping one another. It all counts in a big way.

8. Don’t sweat the small stuff.

9. Pick your battles.

Sometimes you just have to let the small stuff be and know when to pick your battles. Everything doesn’t have to be a big deal.

10. Spend time together doing what the other loves.

Doing what the other loves shows you care about their interests just as much as your own.

 

 

 

 

11. Remember why you fell in love in the first place.

Think about the why often…trust me, it’ll make you smile!

12. It’s ok to be wrong.

No one is always right and it’s not the end of the world if you’re wrong.

13. Apologize and mean it.

Don’t apologize just to appease the other person. Only apologize if you mean it.

14. Never go to bed angry.

Try to work out whatever gripes you have and don’t take it to bed with you.

15. Keep your marriage between the two of you.

You are a married couple. A couple is two. So keep whatever goes on in your marriage between the two of you.

16. Flirt with each other.

Bust out those old pick up lines and dust them off! Haha!

17. Compromise.

You have to compromise. One person cannot always get what they want.

18. Talk to each other.

Seems obvious that you should talk to your spouse. But that’s just it; just as easy as it can be to talk to each other, it can be just as easy to not talk to each other. Communication is key!

19. Make family decisions together.

You made a family together. So make family decisions as a couple.

20. Say I love you everyday.

Face to face. In a text. Over the phone. On a sticky note. It doesn’t matter how you do it, just do it.

 

 

What to take from this

There you have it…nothing extra special, probably things you have heard before. The thing is, you both have to want your marriage to work for it to last. You both have to work on making it a success. Every. Single. Day. I hope that you found a few things that you can use in your own marriage.

 

 

Now for the awesome wedding anniversary gift we got made!!!

So…have you ever heard of a company named Modern Map Art? Well, up until a month ago, neither had I. The company reached out to me about a month ago and asked if I would be interested in getting some Star Map Art done. I had no idea what Star Map Art was, so I went to their website, Modern Map Art, to check out what it was. I was in awe. You can custom make a night sky with any date and place you would like! You can customize the style, size, color scheme, fonts and decide if you would like the constellations mapped of your date & coordinates or leave it as the night sky; and have a border or no border. You can add any date and place you want, and decide if you would like the actual coordinates for the place you choose to be on the art itself.

I of course chose where we got married; Las Vegas, Nevada and our wedding date; August 8, 1998. I also picked a custom title, had a border added and the constellations added as well. I chose a custom font from the list of fonts and had the coordinates added to my art as well. I received my 16 x 20 poster in the mail in about 3 days, and all I had to do was put it in a frame! I think it came out so nice! What do you think? Pretty cool, huh?!

 

This was definitely a great gift idea, and we both love it! It’s one of the most special gifts we have.

 

Do you have a special occasion coming up and are looking for the PERFECT gift? A Star Map Art from Modern Map Art is the perfect gift! Modern Map Art has other products as well, check out all their products here.

 

All in all, it was a great anniversary, and I look forward to sharing my life with my husband for twenty plus more years!

Anitra J.